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Friday, January 13, 2012

Guest Post: Why I Watch the Bachelor

Today we have a guest post comes from the incomparable Sarah Storer. Maybe you're one of the lucky ones who already read her blog (, or follow her on Twitter (@sarahjstorer). But if you aren't, you need to get on that train ASAP. She's thoughtful, has a knack for telling a good story, and most important, she's balls out funny. 

So without further ado, here she is. Today's topic:


I watch The Bachelor.

There, I said it.

I know it’s a show that perpetuates negative female stereotypes--always fighting over one man! Emotionally unstable! Would throw another woman under the bus for love!--and let’s not even get started on how the women who choose to pursue a career over love are portrayed. 

I also know it’s a show that, with a little editing magic, can portray a perfectly normal lady as a raging psychopathic bitch (who is eventually labeled as a “man stealer”…as if you’re not all in that hot tub together, ladies). 

And I know it’s a show that, for all its hype about “finding love” has a pretty sketchy track record for actually accomplishing that end.

But I watch it anyway. Sometimes I yell at the TV screen. Sometimes I roll my eyes so hard that I can hear them.

And sometimes, I get a little weepy.

Yeah, I said that, too.

This show is about extremes, and I get weepy over extremes. 

It’s extreme to go onto a TV show, compete with 30 other women who are either just as or more beautiful and accomplished than you are, and then somehow convince yourself that it’s really your LAST CHANCE AT LOVE. It’s extreme for one person to have his or her pick of crazy-attractive people, all at once (you know, aside from delusions of grandeur at the bar on a Saturday night). And it’s extreme-ly lucky for someone to actually find love in that situation.

If it works, it’s pretty cool. Yay, love!

When it doesn’t work—which is often—it’s kind of heartbreaking. What happened to that beautiful, successful woman on the screen who has some serious stanky-cry-face going on that makes her think that THIS was her last chance at love? I want to go up to those women (who, granted, have just been through the equivalent of the weirdest version of emotional summer camp ever) and tell them, “You’re okay. We’re all okay. Suck it up, sister.”

But maybe I watch because there is a TOTALLY INSANE part of me that wants to believe that this next season will be the one where the women are gracious to each other. That this one will show more beautiful, accomplished ladies who are truly passionate about their careers and either a) don’t make excuses for that passion or b) quickly negate that passion by saying, “But of course, I can’t wait to be a wife and mother one day.” 

Not that there’s anything wrong with being a wife and mother, of course, but there is also nothing wrong with being a woman and passionately loving what you do…and being okay with being defined by that fact, regardless of whether a man thinks you should be or not.

Obviously, I know that’s not the formula of the show. No one really wants an hour and a half of level-headedness, practicality and kindness…otherwise, we’d all still be watching Mr. Rogers re-runs. (Which was a great-meow show-meow!)

<snarky aside> Besides, if it wasn’t mostly an invitation to Tears-ville, how else would we compare ourselves to those women and say, “OMG, I’d NEVER do that. What a crazy betch!” </snarky aside>

But I can hope for it, right? Or, I can at least hope for it in my everyday life. Practice it, even. After all, if we can’t be supportive of each other, who else can we count on to do it?

Well, if nothing else, I’ll watch because I totally like to be on “boner patrol.” 

C’mon…tell me you’re not looking for it after some steamy hot tub make-out sesh. OF COURSE YOU ARE.

Oh…it’s just me? Okay then.


Sarah J. Storer  is a blogger, speaker and storyteller who calls Columbus, OH home. Her internationally read blog ( is a quirky mix of life, love and relationship advice, and snarky musings. When she's not writing, she enjoys helping businesses with creative social concepts, and has also been seen on the stage and screen performing improv, theatre and stand-up. She is currently looking forward to co-hosting Jane in the City, a dating show coming to theJane.TV network in Fall 2011, and helping other women learn to trust their guts and use their noggins when it comes to love. 


  1. Love it! & Sarah's hilarious way of telling it.
    (Even if I don't watch the Bachelor, I do read your blog! lol)